Death is something every human must face, yet it is rarely discussed openly or honestly. From a young age, many people are taught to avoid thinking about dying, as if silence will somehow make it less real or less frightening. This avoidance often leads to fear that grows quietly in the background, especially when illness enters the picture. When a loved one is nearing the end of life, families can feel overwhelmed by uncertainty, unsure of what is normal and terrified of missing signs that something is wrong. Much of this fear comes not from death itself, but from not knowing what to expect as the body and mind begin to change.
Experts in hospice and end of life care often say that learning about the dying process can actually reduce fear rather than increase it. When people understand what commonly happens near death, they are less likely to panic and more able to respond with calm, presence, and compassion. Hospice workers see familiar patterns across patients of all ages and backgrounds, yet many families encounter these changes for the first time without guidance. One experienced hospice nurse has made it her mission to bring these conversations into the open, helping people understand that dying is often far gentler than they imagine.
A Hospice Nurse Helping People Feel Less Afraid of Death
Julie McFadden, known online as Hospice Nurse Julie, has spent years caring for people in their final days and weeks of life. Through her work in hospice settings and her widely shared videos, she focuses on explaining what families and patients often experience as death approaches. Her goal is not to sensationalize dying, but to normalize it so people can feel less frightened and more supported. Her profile summarizes her mission clearly as “Helping understand death to live better and die better,” a message that resonates deeply with those facing serious illness.
Over the course of her career, McFadden has witnessed hundreds of deaths, allowing her to notice patterns that repeat again and again. Families entering hospice care are often anxious and unsure, worried that every physical or emotional change signals suffering or decline. Many assume that dying is always chaotic or painful, and they fear being unprepared for what they might see or hear. Part of McFadden’s role is helping families understand which changes are expected and which ones are cause for concern.
In one of her recent videos, McFadden discussed a sign she sees so frequently that hospice teams now prepare families for it ahead of time. This sign often appears weeks before death and tends to surprise people who have never been around someone who is dying. Rather than being distressing, this experience is usually calming and deeply meaningful for the person nearing the end of life.
The One Sign Hospice Nurses See Before Death
In her video, McFadden introduces the topic by saying, “Here’s one sign that someone is close to death that most people don’t believe happens.” She explains that this sign commonly appears a few weeks to a month before death, especially for patients receiving hospice care. According to her experience, it is not rare or unusual, but something that occurs in more than half of hospice patients she has cared for over the years.
She describes the experience directly by saying, “Usually a few weeks to a month before someone dies, if they’re on hospice, they will start seeing dead loved ones, dead relatives, dead pets.” She goes on to emphasize how common this is by adding, “This happens so often that we actually put it in our educational packets that we give to patients and their families when they come on hospice so they aren’t surprised or scared when it happens.” This preparation helps families respond with understanding rather than alarm.
This experience is referred to as visioning. Hospice professionals recognize it as a natural and common part of the dying process for many people. Patients often describe these visions clearly and calmly, without confusion or fear. Instead of appearing distressed, many patients seem reassured by what they are experiencing.
What Visioning Looks Like for Dying Patients
Visioning often involves people or animals who were deeply meaningful to the patient during life. These may include parents, spouses, siblings, close friends, or beloved pets who have already passed away. Patients might talk about these loved ones visiting them, sitting nearby, or simply being present in the room. The way patients describe these moments often suggests familiarity and comfort rather than surprise or fear.
Some individuals experience sensory memories connected to comfort and safety. They may describe smelling a loved one’s perfume, a parent’s cigar, or familiar foods from childhood. Others talk about being taken on peaceful journeys or having vivid memories that feel almost tangible. Hospice nurses report that some patients say the room feels crowded, as if many people are gathered together, though this sensation is usually described as reassuring rather than overwhelming.
According to hospice workers, these experiences tend to leave patients feeling calmer. Families are often surprised to see loved ones who were anxious earlier in their illness become more relaxed once visioning begins. Rather than causing distress, these moments often bring emotional ease and a sense of reassurance.
Why Visioning Is Not Caused by Oxygen Loss
A common belief is that visioning happens because the brain is not getting enough oxygen or because of medications used near the end of life. McFadden directly addresses this concern, explaining that this explanation does not fit what hospice teams observe. She says, “Because when it does happen, most people are alert and oriented and are at least a month from death, so they don’t have low oxygen.”
Hospice professionals consistently note that patients experiencing visioning are often mentally clear. They can recognize family members, hold conversations, and describe their experiences in detail. This clarity is one reason hospice teams do not view visioning as a medical emergency or a symptom that needs to be treated in most cases.
McFadden also emphasizes how widespread the experience is by stating, “We don’t know why it happens, but we see it in definitely more than half of our patients.” Because of how often it occurs, hospice teams now educate families about it in advance so they are not frightened or tempted to pursue unnecessary medical interventions.
Why These Visions Are Often Comforting
One of the most meaningful aspects of visioning is how comforting it tends to be for patients. The figures who appear are often people who made the patient feel safe, loved, or protected earlier in life. Patients may see a nurturing parent rather than someone associated with fear, or a spouse who provided emotional security and companionship.
Christopher Kerr, CEO of Hospice and Palliative Care in Buffalo, New York, has studied these experiences extensively. He has observed that the emotional meaning of the experience matters far more than explaining its cause. In an interview, he said, “I have witnessed cases where what I was seeing was so profound, and the meaning for the patient was so clear and precise, that I almost felt like an intruder.”
Kerr later reflected on why he stopped trying to scientifically explain these moments, saying, “And trying to decipher the etiology, the cause, seemed futile. I concluded that it was simply important to have reverence, that the fact that I could not explain the origin and process did not invalidate the experience for the patient.” This perspective aligns closely with hospice care’s focus on comfort and dignity.
How Families Should Respond When Visioning Happens
For families, hearing a loved one talk about seeing deceased relatives or pets can be confusing or unsettling at first. Hospice nurses encourage families to remain calm and to respond with openness rather than correction. Arguing with a dying person about what is real can increase distress and make them feel misunderstood or dismissed.
Hospice teams advise families to listen carefully and respond with reassurance. Gentle acknowledgment, quiet presence, or simply allowing the patient to talk about their experience can be deeply supportive. The goal is not to explain or challenge the experience, but to honor how it makes the patient feel.
Experts also emphasize that visioning does not require treatment unless it causes fear or agitation. In most cases, it is not something to stop or manage. It is simply one of the many ways the mind and body transition as life comes to a close.
A Different Way to Look at the Final Weeks of Life
While death remains one of life’s great unknowns, experiences like visioning offer insight into how gentle the final weeks can sometimes be. For many patients, this period includes peace, emotional comfort, and a sense of connection rather than constant pain or fear. Families who understand this ahead of time often feel more at ease and less overwhelmed.
Hospice nurses frequently remind families that dying is not only a physical process, but also an emotional and deeply personal one. Memories, relationships, and feelings often come to the surface in powerful ways. When families are prepared, they are better able to focus on presence, love, and meaningful moments instead of fear.
Learning about these experiences does not take away the sadness of loss, but it can soften the experience. For many, knowing that a loved one may feel comforted and supported in their final weeks brings a sense of peace that lasts long after goodbye.
