Dating on its own is intimidating enough. You’d think it gets easier as you get older but this couldn’t be further from the truth. You still have to go through all the jittery nervousness, the awkward conversations, and the fear of rejection. Re-entering the dating game after a divorce or death of a spouse can be even more of an emotional rollercoaster. If you’re still reconsidering your decision to get back in the dating circle, maybe this article could help you make that leap.
These are some ways to make it a little easier.
1. Be Comfortable In Your Skin
Before you can expect others to appreciate you for who you are, you have to do it yourself. Many women struggle with body image as the natural effects of aging start to show. Every wrinkle and stretch mark can feel like another blow to your self-esteem. Do what you need to do to feel beautiful. It could be working out or pampering yourself with makeup and a spa day. Recognize that you are more than just your body and rediscover who you are as an individual, especially if you’ve recently gotten out of a long-term relationship or a marriage.
2. Identify What You Want From Dating
Figure out what it is that you want from dating. Your aim could be a long-term commitment, a casual relationship, or simply to meet new people and have fun. Once you have this chalked out clearly, make it known to potential partners at the appropriate time. This helps you find partners that have the same wants and needs and weeds out those that don’t.
3. Get Outside And Get Involved
To be able to date men you have to be meeting them regularly. Don’t be afraid to go out with friends on the weekends. Join clubs or classes that sound interesting and fun to you. It’s a great way to meet people with similar interests and puts you in touch with a wider variety of people than if you were to simply travel between work and your home, week in and week out.
4. Forget Your ‘Type’
Even if the person who expresses interest in you doesn’t seem to be ‘your type’, give him a chance! There’s every possibility that you two might hit it off. If you’ve constantly looked for certain traits in the past and you’re reading this article, there’s a chance that what you consider ‘your type’ may not be working out for you. There’s nothing to lose from trying something new.
5. Let People Know
It’s good to let people around you know that you’re looking to date. The wider the circle of people you tell, the more likely you are to find better dating options. You might find a potential date through a mutual friend. But for them to set you up, they’ll need to know that you’re available.
6. Don’t Be Afraid Of Online Dating
Online dating used to have an embarrassing stigma attached, but in today’s world, there’s absolutely no shame in trying out the digital dating sphere. In fact, the process might be even easier. You have the option of setting up a profile where you can showcase yourself as a person and let others know what you’re looking for. Looking at others’ profiles also makes it easier for you to narrow down your choices.
7. Be Prepared For Emotional Baggage
The dynamics do change slightly with dating as an older woman. You and other potential dating partners may be divorced or widowed. You may even have children and/or serious health issues that come with age. Don’t let these issues deter you but be prepared for open, healthy conversations surrounding them. Have a clear understanding of your and your partner’s emotional needs. Also, think about what kind of emotional support you can expect from each other.
8. Don’t Be In A Race Against The Clock
Being older, you may feel like you’re running out of time. Fortunately, love and romance do not have an age bracket and you’re never going to be ‘too old’ to have a fulfilling relationship. Racing to find a partner as fast as possible can lead to much anxiety, and a tendency to compromise on your needs in a relationship. Remember that happiness is not dependent on your relationship status. Timing is different for everyone, so don’t lose hope.
9. Don’t Let Yourself Be Pressured
If anything about the dating lifestyle makes you uncomfortable or anxious, don’t be afraid to take a step back. You may be dealing with issues surrounding sex, bodily insecurities, or trust. It’s perfectly alright to take a break and work on these aspects. Surround yourself with supportive friends and family who will help you through them until you are ready to step back out there on your own.
It’s worth taking the time out to work on these aspects of your dating life but above all, don’t compromise on your happiness. If dating is comfortable and fun for you, by all means, go ahead. If at any point you feel like dating just isn’t worth the trouble, don’t fret. You can always find fulfillment in your own life and in your own way.
