Pregnancy is a beautiful, amazing experience. But once childbirth comes and goes, what now? Will sex ever be the same again? It’s enough to stress a lady out. Sex can usually start up six months after giving birth.1 This gives the body time to heal and repair. However, it’s no secret that childbirth changes the body. It affects physical health, mental health, and everything in between. But different doesn’t equal bad. It’ll take some adjustment, but it’s possible to keep the fire alive. Don’t be alarmed if one of these thoughts cross your mind. You’re not alone! Here’s how you can handle each one.
1. “I’m Not Feeling This”
Low sexual desire is common after childbirth.2 Your partner, on the other hand, probably feels the opposite. Instead of stressing out, work on reconnecting. Take it back to square one and don’t be afraid to be playful. Most of all, be patient. Within three months, 80 percent of couples resume sex.3
2. “I Don’t Know What I’m Doing”
Let’s face it. You haven’t had sex in a long, long time. Don’t be hard on yourself if things are a little awkward at first. In time, you’ll both be back into the swing of things.
3. “Don’t Look At Me”
After pushing out a little human, you might feel insecure about your body. This is totally normal. A truly loving partner won’t care. If you’re really struggling with this, be open and talk about it. Expressing your insecurities give them a chance to show that they still love you.
4. “They’re Probably So Grossed Out”
Again, a good partner will still love you and your body. Plus, after not having sex for so long, it won’t even matter! Your new curves are an added bonus, too.
5. “I Think I Stretched Out”
Yes, you probably did. Vaginal looseness is not uncommon after childbirth.4 Regardless, it will eventually feel better, so don’t worry. Just give it time.
6. “Am I Bleeding?”
Watch out for dryness, pain, and bleeding.5 You’re still sensitive down there, after all. Talk to your partner if you’re really worried about these symptoms.
7. “Is The Baby Crying?”
Whether or not you’re having sex, the newest addition will always be on your mind. Let yourself have this moment, though. If you’re really worried about a crying baby, keep a baby camera and radio nearby.
This way, you can just enjoy rediscovering sex.
8. “Don’t Touch My Breast”
Obviously, your breasts have been busy lately. The last thing you need is someone else touching them. If this worries you, be clear with your partner.
9. “This Will Never Be The Same Again”
At first, things will be different, given you just gave birth to a bundle of joy. But just because it’s not the same doesn’t mean it can’t be good. Open communication will change everything.
There’s no doubt that having sex after childbirth is nerve-wracking, awkward, and scary. It’s all about time and patience. Before you know it, you’ll be romping around like old times.
|↑1, ↑3||Elliott, S. A., and J. P. Watson. “Sex during pregnancy and the first postnatal year.” Journal of Psychosomatic Research 29, no. 5 (1985): 541-548.|
|↑2, ↑4, ↑5||Barrett, Geraldine, Elizabeth Pendry, Janet Peacock, Christina Victor, Rance Thakar, and Isaac Manyonda. “Women’s sexual health after childbirth.” BJOG: An International Journal of Obstetrics & Gynaecology 107, no. 2 (2000): 186-195.|