Is there a right age to be pregnant? That’s a tricky question to answer because it solely depends on the individual and her health. However, researchers have shown that increased risks at birth are more common among older mothers – women over 35 years of age – than younger mothers.1
This does not mean that you cannot get pregnant after you’ve hit your 30s. It only means that there are pros and cons – like any other age groups – that you may have to deal with when you choose to be pregnant in your 30s. Being pregnant at an older age may be frowned upon in the society, but you should have a control over your body and you can always bear a child and cherish the essence of motherhood only when you are ready for it.
If you are an older-mommy-to-be, here are a few things that you may want to keep in mind.
1. You Have No Regrets
So, you are entering motherhood way later than your friends or cousins. But, you have no regrets because you have had enough time to do most things you have wanted to in your life. Being single or being a couple has allowed you to grow as a person and your experiences have gone a step further from what others may have achieved. It may be a talent, a hobby, a sport, or any other accomplishment that has made you the person you are.
So, when others say that you could have conceived earlier, you can always look back at what you have achieved and know that now you have the best of both worlds!
2. You Have Financial Stability
You may have had your ups and downs when you were in your 20s and you were not really sure what you should do about your career. But with age, you also grow in your career – a plus when you are older because you are well established in your career. So, being an older mother ensures enough financial support and you may not have to worry too much about giving the best education your children deserve.
By being financially stable, you can also be sure of emotional stability. Although these may not seem important, these feelings certainly make you feel more confident about motherhood.
3. Your Instincts And Perspective Will Help
Trust your instincts when you are on your journey to motherhood. You know best how to raise your child. It is important to pay heed to what the father says, too. If what your mother told you does not help, it is okay. You can always start your own comfortable way of being there for your little one.
Sometimes, broadening your perspective helps. That helps you visualize the bigger picture because while your friends may have their children going to college, you have just begun your journey and it is even better because you are ready.
4. Your Past Experiences Count
I am sure you can recall that “panic attack” you had when you were asked to give your first presentation in school. Your mom would have told those right words to make you feel better. Having a child when you are older only doubles the help your child needs. You have come so far and seen so much in life that you will be able to give the right advice when your child needs some, the right words to make them feel better, or even the right attitude toward certain things your children follow.
So, don’t think that your age is going to come in the way of raising your baby; it only makes it better because you have grown wiser with your experiences from the past.
5. You Should Never Compare
Comparing yourself with others may be the worst thing you can do to yourself as an individual. Comparing where you are in life will not help you achieve anything; in fact, it may just drain your self-confidence. Whether you are a mother in your 20s or 40s, motherhood will always remain motherhood and what others do to raise their children may not be the best way to raise yours.
There is no harm asking your experienced friends how you should go about certain things, but it is never okay to compare yourself with others. You have your own unique gift and talent; so, you are no less a mother than the others.
6. You Will Always Be The Perfect Mom
Whether you are in your 20s or in your 50s, your children will love you for the mother you are. For your children, you will always be the definition of a perfect mother, irrespective of your age. Doing all the right things for your children and spending enough time with them every day is what a mother does. So, give them all your love and care and time (maybe a few candies) and you are going to be their definition of a perfect mom.
So, if you have decided to become a mother and you are at the other end of the “age” spectrum, you have nothing to worry about. You just need to cherish the journey and learn from the mistakes you make just like you would even if you were younger.
|↑1||Lampinen, Reeta, Katri Vehviläinen-Julkunen, and Päivi Kankkunen. “A review of pregnancy in women over 35 years of age.” The open nursing journal 3 (2009): 33.|